Rolling Mousefur
Song: Rolling Girl (English Dub) A rolling girl is always far away In her dream world she longs to stay So much noise buzzing round inside her head All the worries never end, all the worries never end... "Are you okay...?" Mousefur's eyes flickered open, she glared around, complete darkness. "If this is a trick, I'll claw your-" "Mousefur, would your own brother trick you?" The lithe brown tabby tom appeared in front of her. "R-Runningwind..." Her voice trailed off, she longed to say more, but the words caught in her throat. "Thornpaw and I could've saved you, we could've-..." Mousefur couldn't say more, for Runningwind rose his tail for silence. It was only a few days after his death, the attack Tigerclaw had set out for them. Firestar said he saw Whitethroat over the tom's body. She longed to kill that tom, but it turns out he died on the thunderpath anyways. The tom shook his head slightly. "It wasn't your fault, sister..." He murmured softly, eyes warm and sparkling with youth. "You just... Disappeared, we were attacked..And you just left us!" She sobbed, half yelling in mock anger. He looked shaken and turned away. "I was trying to protect you and Thornpaw. The only way was to sacrifice myself for the ones I love most." Mousefur's eyes widened. "I didn't mean what I said..." "I knew exactly what you meant." "No problem" is so easily said But now, is there any meaning left? She fails once more, fails once more After searching for the odd one out in the crowd, She starts spinning again... "Are you okay?" Mousefur slowly padded into the elders den, where Longtail was crouched low in a corner. He looked up, yet she knew he couldn't see anything. His vision failed him only days before. "You don't get what it feels like, Mousefur..." Before she could question him he answered, "I know your scent by heart." She glanced away slightly. But he continued. "The darkness, constant, you can't see anything, all you can do is smell, hear and taste...I feel so, helpless...Worthless..." His voice lowered to a mutter. Mousefur padded over and almost pressed against him, but then turned and slowly padded out. One more time, one more time "I think I will keep rolling on today too" And so she says, so she says Making sure that each of her words is sincere "Welcome." Longtail's soft mew came from his nest, his scarred and blind, yet sparkling eyes set on Mousefur. "Still remember my scent?" She purred hoarsely. He got to his paws, and touched noses with her. "I told you, I could never forget. And now, I never will." Mousefur pulled away with a smile. "Yeah, I'll be here for a while." "A long while, if I know you any better. You'll be tormenting kits for all eternity." He joked, giving his tail a flick. Her voice slightly lowered, looking to her paws. "Being and elder," she started softly, "Is it hard? I-I remember when you said you felt worthless..." Her eyes followed into his, he looked confused. "Do you still feel that way? Do you think I will?" He pressed his cheek against her's. "Only you can determine that, Mousefur." "Are you okay? No, I'm in a daze Trying to escape but I just don't see the point. Maybe I should just stop breathing." "She's...Dead?" Goldenflower wept softly. "The poor she-cat! So young...So lost..." "Oh, quiet." Mousefur rolled her eyes, yet she was hiding away a strong sadness. Cinderpelt's dead. Runningwind's dead. Everyone's dead! She wanted to cry out, her mind swirling with thoughts. I...I could've saved them all! I'm worthless, worthless like how Longtail felt before, empty, helpless, worthless! Like a malformed kit! "Mousefur..?" Goldenflower murmured, sweeping her tail across Mousefur's cheek. The brown she-cat didn't realize tears were in her eyes, "Cinderpelt should've been more careful." She tried to keep her voice angered, but there was a crack in her words. Longtail grazed his flank against her's. "You okay?" He whispered into her ear. "I'm fine!" She snapped turning away. "Stop worrying about me, and start worrying about getting us off this ledge. The badgers are gone, and I need to fuss at some apprentices." Mousefur smirked. The two other elders laughed and Mousefur turned away, trying to find a strategy for getting down, yet her brain felt like it was in a haze. All these cats, dead. And she barely fought but one badger who tried to get up on the ledge... A rolling girl feels she has reached the end, The colours blend and can't be felt All these voices are fighting to be heard They're all merging into one, they're all merging into one. Running, she was running. Deep and swallowed in darkness, the type of darkness she had seen seasons ago when Runningwind ventured into her dreams. "Stop!" She yelped out, angry and terrified at the same time. "Leave me ALONE!" Runningwind was in front of her, "Stop running away..." He murmured, eyes narrowed. "Don't ignore your fears." She looked around, wildly, cats all around her. Cinderpelt, Graystripe, who had recently gone missing, Goldenflower, Whitestorm. Everyone! Everyone she could've saved. "L-leave me alone..." Her voice stuttered, eyes wide with complete fear.